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Monday, July 28, 2014
Tuesday, July 22, 2014
Loving What You Cannot Keep
I had NO IDEA that 2014 would give me too many things to love that I would never keep.
My little Asa. My first boy. My rough and tough bruiser. He's been my sidekick for only a short time now but I know that when he's gone I'm going to feel the silence in my house.
When Ree left, my mom had the hardest time. Right off the bat, Ree took to calling her Grandma all on her own. I mean, they bonded immediately over how small my mom's nose was. She bought her princess clothes and lip gloss and a Chuckie Cheese party fit for the Queen. She was ours. For a very short time. Because, really, she wasn't.
My mom begged me, "Don't ever do this to me again."
Every now and then I catch my mom daydreaming and she always replies, "I wonder what Ree is doing right now. Where she is. Who has her."
The grief in this process is as immense as the joy. I go into it fully understanding that these are not my children and that I am only being a temporary friend. But somehow, every time, they captivate me and I find myself in love with their tiny fingers and big brown eyes and not ever wanting to let go.
It doesn't get any easier. But it does continue to fill my days with joy. And I can focus on that.
If you've ever felt led to provide temporary care to a child in need in Chicago, please contact me via email at maxwell664@aol.com.
Sunday, July 20, 2014
Asa
I have new news about Little Man :)
I recently discovered that his family calls him by his middle name-----which means we can too, because it does not reveal his identity.
Asa.
(ayyyy-sah). Sounds a lot like "HEY SON!" when you're yelling his name to stop at the stop sign.
Asa was a name I'd never really heard of before. I knew it was biblical, but curiosity got me online looking for its background. Lemmetellyou, IT IS A COOL NAME.
In Yoruba Nigeria, Asa means Little Hawk.
In Igbo Nigeria, Asa means Beautiful.
In Indonesian, Asa means Hope.
In Japanese, Asa means Morning or Dawn.
In Hebrew, Asa means Healer, Physician, Doctor
Then there's the famous people...
King Asa in the Old Testament ruled during Kingdom of Judah and was father to Jehoshaphat. He was the first righteous and fair leader born into a string of wicked Kings who came before him.
Asa Griggs Chandler who founded the Coca-Cola Company.
Asa Philip Randolph who was an African-American civil rights leader who founded the first black labor union.
ANYWAYS, Little Man's first name isn't even this cool. ASA. I love it so much it's learned a spot on my list for the future. Stay blessed.
I recently discovered that his family calls him by his middle name-----which means we can too, because it does not reveal his identity.
Asa.
(ayyyy-sah). Sounds a lot like "HEY SON!" when you're yelling his name to stop at the stop sign.
Asa was a name I'd never really heard of before. I knew it was biblical, but curiosity got me online looking for its background. Lemmetellyou, IT IS A COOL NAME.
In Yoruba Nigeria, Asa means Little Hawk.
In Igbo Nigeria, Asa means Beautiful.
In Indonesian, Asa means Hope.
In Japanese, Asa means Morning or Dawn.
In Hebrew, Asa means Healer, Physician, Doctor
Then there's the famous people...
King Asa in the Old Testament ruled during Kingdom of Judah and was father to Jehoshaphat. He was the first righteous and fair leader born into a string of wicked Kings who came before him.
Asa Griggs Chandler who founded the Coca-Cola Company.
Asa Philip Randolph who was an African-American civil rights leader who founded the first black labor union.
ANYWAYS, Little Man's first name isn't even this cool. ASA. I love it so much it's learned a spot on my list for the future. Stay blessed.
Friday, July 18, 2014
Tell Me The Difference
It's no secret that I am having a head-over-heels love affair with the entire country of Uganda.
Uganda. It is my happy place.
Hence the name of this blog.
I get a lot of questions from friends and strangers who are simply curious, and mean well, but often ask me Why Africa? Why not focus on helping the children who are suffering here?
My answer is always that I do both. Because I do. Here in Chicago and in Kishanje.
Some people that do not understand exactly what life in Uganda is like, who have neither visited or even studied third world crisis, tend to believe a "care for our own" policy.
My belief is yes, we must care for our own children. We must. We can not ever ignore the enormous amount of children in this country who suffer just as much pain and violence and hunger. The pain here is immense. Yes, always, care for our own.
But we also have a duty, as human beings, NOT to ignore the 47 million orphans living over seas. The children who literally spend six years slowly starving towards death. The children starving for education, for rice, for health care, for someone to pick them up.
"Care for our own" is just another way of saying "we are above you." It is just another way of saying "you are less visible to us." It is just another way of saying INEQUALITY in 2014.
Think about how we actually managed to colonize this country. We established a country that believed it was okay to oppress people in order to compete in the world. And we thought we were doing it all in the name of Freedom.
Think Indian Reorganization.
Slavery.
Mexican-American War.
Jim Crow.
Japanese-American Internment.
Anti-Semitism.
Before any ethnic/religious groups won their equal rights in this country, policy-makers, politicians, wealthy white heterosexual male Christian folk said the same thing...."care for our own."
How barbaric the United States were when they were "caring for their own." US, the 50 states...the UNITED States were divided because people with money in their hands said "us" not "them."
Once we started caring for each other, regardless of difference...we realized how stupid we were. I see this everyday when I teach the Civil War and the Civil Rights Movement and WWII to my fifth graders. They are dumbfounded by how ignorant our world used to be.
So, we are learning from history. What then, might we learn in the next 50 years? Will we look back in 2064 and think how dumb were we not to pay attention to female gendercide in China and India? How ignorant of us not to pursue drought crisis and famine solutions in Sub-Saharan Africa? How completely absurd that we did not educate 2/3 of the generation responsible for caring for this planet once we were gone?
So. My answer is always that I do both. Because both matter. And because in both cases, children are involved. And to me, every single child is equal in value to the next.
If I can help one person in Chicago, that is baby steps for a suffering city. If I can help one person in Kishanje, that is baby steps for a suffering city.
Tell me the difference between these smiles.
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So, my answer is always, do both, when you can. And when you can't? You are only human. Just do what you can where ever you can. Whether you "do" in Southside Chicago or Evanston, Illinois. Or in Washington, D.C. or the D.R.C. or the Domican Republic. Just DO.
For every John Smith working in Singapore, I pray for a Judy Smith working in Columbia. For every John Doe donating dollars to Liberia, I pray there is a Jane Doe donating in Bulgaria. For every new Charter School built this year in Chicago, I pray for one in Detroit and Maryland and San Juan and Kiev.
For me, by spontaneous coincidence, it was an opportunity to go see Uganda---and I just, very simply, fell in love. I just like it. The same way you might like the NBA or bacon (cause who doesn't?) or vacationing in the Caribbean. It's an interest of mine outside of Chicago.
So----- Whenever possible, try not to believe that international borders should serve to act as human rights dividers.
Uganda. It is my happy place.
Hence the name of this blog.
I get a lot of questions from friends and strangers who are simply curious, and mean well, but often ask me Why Africa? Why not focus on helping the children who are suffering here?
My answer is always that I do both. Because I do. Here in Chicago and in Kishanje.
Some people that do not understand exactly what life in Uganda is like, who have neither visited or even studied third world crisis, tend to believe a "care for our own" policy.
My belief is yes, we must care for our own children. We must. We can not ever ignore the enormous amount of children in this country who suffer just as much pain and violence and hunger. The pain here is immense. Yes, always, care for our own.
But we also have a duty, as human beings, NOT to ignore the 47 million orphans living over seas. The children who literally spend six years slowly starving towards death. The children starving for education, for rice, for health care, for someone to pick them up.
"Care for our own" is just another way of saying "we are above you." It is just another way of saying "you are less visible to us." It is just another way of saying INEQUALITY in 2014.
Think about how we actually managed to colonize this country. We established a country that believed it was okay to oppress people in order to compete in the world. And we thought we were doing it all in the name of Freedom.
Think Indian Reorganization.
Slavery.
Mexican-American War.
Jim Crow.
Japanese-American Internment.
Anti-Semitism.
Before any ethnic/religious groups won their equal rights in this country, policy-makers, politicians, wealthy white heterosexual male Christian folk said the same thing...."care for our own."
How barbaric the United States were when they were "caring for their own." US, the 50 states...the UNITED States were divided because people with money in their hands said "us" not "them."
Once we started caring for each other, regardless of difference...we realized how stupid we were. I see this everyday when I teach the Civil War and the Civil Rights Movement and WWII to my fifth graders. They are dumbfounded by how ignorant our world used to be.
So, we are learning from history. What then, might we learn in the next 50 years? Will we look back in 2064 and think how dumb were we not to pay attention to female gendercide in China and India? How ignorant of us not to pursue drought crisis and famine solutions in Sub-Saharan Africa? How completely absurd that we did not educate 2/3 of the generation responsible for caring for this planet once we were gone?
So. My answer is always that I do both. Because both matter. And because in both cases, children are involved. And to me, every single child is equal in value to the next.
If I can help one person in Chicago, that is baby steps for a suffering city. If I can help one person in Kishanje, that is baby steps for a suffering city.
Tell me the difference between these smiles.
So, my answer is always, do both, when you can. And when you can't? You are only human. Just do what you can where ever you can. Whether you "do" in Southside Chicago or Evanston, Illinois. Or in Washington, D.C. or the D.R.C. or the Domican Republic. Just DO.
For every John Smith working in Singapore, I pray for a Judy Smith working in Columbia. For every John Doe donating dollars to Liberia, I pray there is a Jane Doe donating in Bulgaria. For every new Charter School built this year in Chicago, I pray for one in Detroit and Maryland and San Juan and Kiev.
For me, by spontaneous coincidence, it was an opportunity to go see Uganda---and I just, very simply, fell in love. I just like it. The same way you might like the NBA or bacon (cause who doesn't?) or vacationing in the Caribbean. It's an interest of mine outside of Chicago.
So----- Whenever possible, try not to believe that international borders should serve to act as human rights dividers.
Thursday, July 17, 2014
Little Man Turns 2!
Oh boy! He has arrived! Let's call him Little Man.
Little Man is TWO. Very, very, very 2. And two year olds are really good at 2 things:
1.) Throwing food
a.) from their high chair
b.) from their stroller
c.) at a stranger
d.) at the dog
e.) in your face
f.) or smearing it into the rug, window, iPhone, leather couch, air vent, their own butt crack
2.) And throwing tantrums because they cannot
a.) eat dog food
b.) lick the broom
c.) have chicken nuggets for breakfast
d.) splash in the toilet
e.) play with toothpaste
f.) reach their crackers
After you get used to his drunken sailor walk (always thinking he'll wipe out on the concrete) and his constant gibberish (that sounds a bit like Klingon)... you totally learn this little Tazmanian Devil is a genius!! Even though Little Man can't actually talk, he does seem to know all the words to Katy Perry/Lady Gaga/Rihanna songs. And he can sort of say (pl)"eeeeeeeeeez." He can ALSO pluck the strings on a guitar rather impressively, line up all his Hot Wheels in a perfectly straight line, feed the dog cookies, start his own bath water, dance with amazing rhythm and do somersaults. He continues to surprise me every minute with cool things. Human development just blows my mind.
How hard must it be to be super intelligent and everyone around you just thinks you poop your pants?
Sometimes in my mind I imagine what Little Man is really thinking in his....and it probably sounds a bit like Gru from Despicable Me.
We celebrated his 2nd birthday yesterday by playing hooky at work and being beach bums. Enjoy the warm weather while it's here!
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Little Man is TWO. Very, very, very 2. And two year olds are really good at 2 things:
1.) Throwing food
a.) from their high chair
b.) from their stroller
c.) at a stranger
d.) at the dog
e.) in your face
f.) or smearing it into the rug, window, iPhone, leather couch, air vent, their own butt crack
2.) And throwing tantrums because they cannot
a.) eat dog food
b.) lick the broom
c.) have chicken nuggets for breakfast
d.) splash in the toilet
e.) play with toothpaste
f.) reach their crackers
After you get used to his drunken sailor walk (always thinking he'll wipe out on the concrete) and his constant gibberish (that sounds a bit like Klingon)... you totally learn this little Tazmanian Devil is a genius!! Even though Little Man can't actually talk, he does seem to know all the words to Katy Perry/Lady Gaga/Rihanna songs. And he can sort of say (pl)"eeeeeeeeeez." He can ALSO pluck the strings on a guitar rather impressively, line up all his Hot Wheels in a perfectly straight line, feed the dog cookies, start his own bath water, dance with amazing rhythm and do somersaults. He continues to surprise me every minute with cool things. Human development just blows my mind.
How hard must it be to be super intelligent and everyone around you just thinks you poop your pants?
Sometimes in my mind I imagine what Little Man is really thinking in his....and it probably sounds a bit like Gru from Despicable Me.
We celebrated his 2nd birthday yesterday by playing hooky at work and being beach bums. Enjoy the warm weather while it's here!
Thursday, July 10, 2014
Waiting For Monday
It has been just over two months since I last hosted a child in my home. And, actually, it has flown by.
There's a lot of beneficial aspects to being "single," as I've started calling it. For one, I don't step on Legos in my bare feet anymore. And I drink a lot of margaritas while watching Orange is the New Black whenever I want to.
But, it hasn't been so extremely fantastic that I could continue being "single" forever. I'm already starting to crave having a kiddo around to build forts with. Even if it means spending my free time after work scraping peanut butter out of the leather couch. Bring on the Spaghetti O's.
And like magic, I got a phone call today. "The Phone Call" always seems to come at the right time. Little Bambino just turned 2 last week and he is coming to stay on Monday for 3 weeks. He will be going to "school" during my working hours close by.
So, I basically have the weekend to run around Chicago looking for Spiderman/Transformer/Hot Wheels/Elmo junk, while attempting to consume enough adult conversation/tacos/Coronas to get me through the next month.
Already in the plans? A Cubs game July 28th, trip to Lake Geneva July 20-21st, Halsted street art fair....and probs plenty more. It will be entertaining (if that's the right word) to discover how a 2 year old can handle any of that.
Enjoy your summer!
There's a lot of beneficial aspects to being "single," as I've started calling it. For one, I don't step on Legos in my bare feet anymore. And I drink a lot of margaritas while watching Orange is the New Black whenever I want to.
But, it hasn't been so extremely fantastic that I could continue being "single" forever. I'm already starting to crave having a kiddo around to build forts with. Even if it means spending my free time after work scraping peanut butter out of the leather couch. Bring on the Spaghetti O's.
And like magic, I got a phone call today. "The Phone Call" always seems to come at the right time. Little Bambino just turned 2 last week and he is coming to stay on Monday for 3 weeks. He will be going to "school" during my working hours close by.
So, I basically have the weekend to run around Chicago looking for Spiderman/Transformer/Hot Wheels/Elmo junk, while attempting to consume enough adult conversation/tacos/Coronas to get me through the next month.
Already in the plans? A Cubs game July 28th, trip to Lake Geneva July 20-21st, Halsted street art fair....and probs plenty more. It will be entertaining (if that's the right word) to discover how a 2 year old can handle any of that.
Enjoy your summer!
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